Thursday, October 31, 2013


I've had a few updates that I forgot to share.

I have to retake my pulse oximetry test.  They weren't able to get enough information that time since it only recorded 1 hour worth of time.  I'll be doing that tonight and they will pick it up tomorrow.  Hopefully, it will work this time and maybe I'll hear the results next week?

I *finally* have an appointment with a neurologist.  It's not until mid December, but at least I have an appointment.

My insurance won't pay for chiropractor or massage, so I can't do those.

While not all bad or good, at least there is progress being made.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Complaining Again...Sorry

Not feeling too hot today. 

I woke up feeling pretty good.  Got out of bed right when the alarm went off and went straight to the shower.  Boy, did that feel good.  Kids got up without too much fussing.  They even got ready with a minimum of fighting and/or playing.

Then, my head started to hurt, I got dizzy and now I'm nauseous.  I really don't like this.  

I haven't heard of my results from the oximetry test.  I'm sure that means it's ok, but I still would rather know.

I just now heard from the neurologist's office.  And I mean that literally.  They sent me a letter to call them to set up an appointment.  I have to wait until December to see him.  

I haven't heard anything about the referral to a chiropractor and/or masseuse.  

I'm so tired of being in limbo and not being able to do anything about it.  My doctor won't try any new pain meds until after I see the neuro.  Which means I don't know if what I'm taking will work from one day to the next.

To top all of this off, I broke the fan on my good laptop and I'm having to use one of the kids'.  It's not powerful enough to be able to play any of the MMO's I like to play.  I'm trying to find something else to do with all the time I have on my hands, but it's hard.  I can't really do as much around the house as I would like, because it's not my house.  I can only read so much without my head hurting.  I can only cross stitch so much without hurting both my head and my wrist.  I can't afford to buy anymore audio books to listen to.  I am not much of tv watcher and movies get old after awhile.

Even worse, I promised my best friend I would help her with her music business and I have been horrible about it.  I feel less than helpful which really sucks.


I know it will get better and I'm really looking forward to that.  I just am having hard time dealing with the now.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Testing Continues.....

I knew I might have some weird tests done with this whole "let's figure out these headaches", but the most recent one was a new one for me.  

Apparently, I snore.  My wonderful fiance has sleep apnea and was concerned that I might have it as well and that it might be a reason for some of the pain and fatigue I have been dealing with.  My doctor wanted to do a preliminary test before sending me for a complete sleep study.  the test is called Pulse Oximetry.  In case you've never heard of this, what they do is put a small probe on the end of one finger.  This in turn is attached to a watch-like device that, of course, goes on your wrist.  You wear this contraption all night while trying to sleep.  This device is supposed to measure your oxygen levels while sleeping to see if they drop low enough to possibly be a problem.

While I know this is not the strangest test I will have done, nor is it the strangest I've already had done, it was not the most comfortable or pleasant.  I don't like having things disrupt my sleep.  I want comfort and I hate being woke up, by anything.  This means I didn't sleep well, at all.  

I'm also annoyed by the fact that when the device was picked up this morning, it had only recorded an hour's worth of time.  I wore that thing for over 8 hours!  They are hoping to be able to get the information they need from it, but if they can't, I will have to go through it all again.  I know that there are worse, more painful, more annoying, etc, things I could (and probably will) have done, but I'm still annoyed that it could have been a night's worth of little sleep for nothing.

On a more positive note, I received a call from my doctor's office yesterday and they have already sent a referral to the neurologist.  I should hear something today or tomorrow, hopefully.  

Monday, October 21, 2013

Woot for Progress!!

Today I saw my Family Doctor again.  I must say I feel pretty good after that visit.  He is referring me to a neurologist as well as a chiropractor and masseuse.  I'm really looking forward to all of this.  It's all a step in the right direction, for which I am very thankful.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Just got sent to my room......

So after a weekend without my kids at home (they went to visit Daddy), I thought today would be good.  I was hopeful that when they got home, I could enjoy having them tell me about their weekend.  It might have even gone that way, had they not had to do homework that wasn't done on Friday.

Homework in my house would give a saint a headache, I swear.  For someone who suffers from daily headaches and frequent migraines, it's hell on Earth.  Two cranky girls in one room crying or getting angry at their math homework is recipe for disaster.  They get mad at each other for the noise, then start yelling.  That gets me cranky.  With stress being the biggest trigger for a migraine for me, being cranky is a bad thing.

I've been sent to my room by my fiance (who is the greatest thing to happen to me since my kids were born) to give me the break I need to try to keep the migraine from happening.  This is one of those things that I am on the fence about.  While I am very grateful to him for being willing to step in when I need him to, I feel bad about it.  They aren't his kids, he's already been dealing with them all day (he did the picking up from their dad's house) and he deserves a break.  I should be able to take care of my girls.  I should be able to deal with the tempers without losing my own.  One argument, that doesn't even involve me, shouldn't send me into agony and make me want to cry.

I try to be hopeful and optimistic, but it's not easy when I have more and more days like today.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

I am Tired!

Today could have been a lot worse, I guess.  At least I had some relief.

I got up at 6, like I do every weekday.  I was feeling all right.  Not great, but not too bad either.  Started to get the kids up for school.  That's when the fun started.  Cranky children make for a cranky mama.  That tends to start the headache.  I was trying to keep my cool.  It didn't work.  Pain, nausea, tears.  I was already a wreck.  

Finally got the kids out the door.  A few deep breaths and I was ready for some breakfast.   Fiance and I managed a walk around town, which actually felt really good.  I thought, "Hey, today might actually be a good day."  

I was wrong.

By noon, I was taking meds and laying down.  Managed a decent nap and woke up refreshed.  I was able to work on laundry.  I even walked up to the school to get the kids.  We got home, got through homework without too much trouble (which is a relief in and of itself) then they got their clothes put away.  I was starting to lose momentum by then, but I was able to make dinner and eat it.

I am now writing this as I contemplate going back to bed.  I'm really tired of sleeping all the time, but at the moment, it's about the only way to deal with the pain when the meds aren't helping.

I have an appointment next week with the doctor to go over my medicines.  I hope we can find not only something abortive to stop the migraines when I get them, but also better medicine to control how often I am getting them.

My Life so Far

This is my first blog, so bear with me.  I am a current migraine sufferer.   I have started this blog in the hopes of helping me deal with them better.  This 1st post is just to get down everything that has happened so far.

Today I had my "intake" with a counselor.  This is a hopeful step towards being able to manage the pain in a way that doesn't affect my family so much.  I am optimistic.  I've decided that I have to be.  I am not sure how much more down I can get, so the only way I can go now is up.

Today has been one of the not so good ones.  I woke up too early and couldn't get back to sleep.  So I got up and tried to do something, anything.  Made it through my email and Facebook before I had to give up.  Tried some cross stitch, which I have recently started to do again in the hopes of having something to do now that I'm not working.  That lasted about 1/2 an hour.  By then, it was time to get my kids up and ready for school.  Once they were gone, I had breakfast.  Could not concentrate on anything long enough after that to do anything.  Finally gave in and laid down with an audio book.  Slept another couple of hours.  That helped me make it until all the kids got home (both mine and my fiances).  They, being kids, were completely excited at being together again.  This means they were loud and very high pitched.  I got cranky and had to go hide in my room for awhile and cry it out.  I still am having trouble concentrating, but I felt the need to get this out in the hopes that it might help.

Through all of this, I have not had much of a headache, nor any of my other migraine symptoms.  Just crankiness and lack of concentration.  And then there is the mental breakdown.  I hate it.  I am so tired of feeling like this.

Today is a day that makes me very glad that I will be starting to see a counselor next week.  I need to find a way to help me cope with this pain while we are working on getting it dealt with.

My new doctor is great.  However, I don't like the new medication he gave me.  He wanted me to try Imitrex tablets for my migraines.  I've tried it twice now and I really don't like it.  It seems to actually make the head pain worse.  I've never had the pins & needles feeling in my head before and let me tell you, it is NOT pleasant.  I won't be taking this again and I will be calling the doctor tomorrow.

I'm very grateful that he is willing to look at new ways to treat my pain, so I'm hopeful that we can find something that works.  *toes crossed*

I have been to see my new doctor today.  I am already looking forward to working with him.  He is waiting to get my records from the previous doctor before he changes my daily meds, but he has already prescribed me a different abortive medication.  

*fingers crossed*  

I think he will actually be worth working with. 

Today's migraine is exacerbated by a sinus infection and a cranky 7 year old.  

Just have to keep reminding myself that at least the sinus infection will pass and the 7 year old won't always be cranky.

I finally understand the reason behind thoughts of suicide for those suffering from chronic pain. 

**No, I'm not thinking about it myself.** 

My little girls still need me and I still want to live. I'm just so very tired of being in constant pain. I'm supposed to work today and tomorrow. Short shifts before I stop completely to figure out these damn migraines. I'm not sure I'll be able to. Not only does that make me want to cry, but it pisses me off. Why can't my body just cooperate for 2 more days?!

I had my migraine MRI today.  Not sure what exactly I am hoping for.  On one hand, I don't want anything to be wrong.  But on the other, it would be nice to have a reason for me feeling so horrible.

**The MRI came back negative.  So, while there is still no reason for the migraines, at least I don't have something life threatening.

Hi.  My name is Cindy and I suffer from Chronic Migraines.

I've had them for over 20 years now.  It used to be that I might get them a few times a year.  However, in the last two years, it's been at least once a week, with at least a headache almost every day.  My primary care physician has been trying all sorts of things to help me with them, but I feel like I'm losing my mind.  I have been lucky not to lose my job.  My fiance is losing patience.  Not having insurance doesn't help.  I'm hoping to get a neurologist to agree to see me on a payment plan of some sort.

I'm not really sure what else to say, just hoping to at least find something.